What Do You Think About?

Can you quote pieces of movies? Can you sing along with the radio on practically every song?  How does your movie knowledge compare with your knowledge of Scripture?  How often do you quote from God's Word? How often do you sing hymns or spiritual songs?  Are your friends mainly Christians, or are they people of the world?

The things we allow into our life are the things we dwell on.  Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. -Philippians 4:8  What knids of thoughts are you having when you watch a movie, listen to the radio, or even read a book?  I'm not saying they are all bad, but lots of them have at least some questionable content.  These are the things on which we are allowing ourselves to meditate.  It only stands to reason that if we are meditating on questionable things, then we aren't meditating on the things we should.  What do you tend to talk about with your friends?  Matthew12:34 - ...for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.  This is a good indiation of what our hearts are thinking.

Is it wrong to watch a movie or television, listen to the radio, read a book, or whatever else you do for entertainment?  No, it doesn't have to be.  We are to diligently guard our heart against the wiles of Satan.  Proverbs 4:23 - Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.  Satan has blatantly satuurated our entertainment, and if we're not careful, it is no longer wholesome.  It is no longer wholesome if we have to rationalize it in any way.  "Just ignore the _____."  You can fill in the blank with profanity, violence, sex, nudity, bad attitudes, immodest clothing, disrespect, etc.  All Satan needs is a single foothold, and that's what these are.

We are to take captive every thought we have and make it obedient to Christ. II Corinthians 10:4 - Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.  We can't do that if we are filling our hearts with worldly ideas.  We will reap what we sow.  Galatians 6:7-8 - Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.  What will you reap?

Announcing...

Thomas Donovan Segerson!  He was born April 1 at 3:31 p.m.  He was a whopping 6 lbs. 15.8 oz. ( I say that sarcastically) and 19 3/4 inches long.  He has brown hair, dark blue eyes, and already has a darker tan than me (from his daddy's side).

At first, his name didn't seem to really fit, and I was thinking of going back to my previous choice of Joseph.  But now he seems to be growing into it or we seem to be getting used to it.  He's nursing very well, and the Lord has blessed me with a very good milk supply.

Sorry it's taken so long to post even this much.  The birth did not go the way I expected or wanted, and it's taking me a while to deal with it.  I remember everything before we went to the hospital very well, and the same for the pushing part, but almost nothing in between except for terror, sadness, and tears.  So when I can, I will write the birth story based on Dh's notes.

Funerals

I'm always so saddened to go to funerals, extra especially the ones for loved ones.  This week, I attended the funeral of a brother in Christ.  He will be so missed by his family and friends! 

I am looking forward to being reunited with Christians who have passed on in paradise.  But even more than that, I am looking forward to heaven, where there will be no more pain, death, or mourning.

Wanted: Preacher

While looking for a preacher for a congregation, so many people won't even consider a man unless he has a college degree from a Christian University.  They feel a preacher must be adequately trained in preaching God's word.  What ever happened to the way it was done in the first century church?  It wasn't just "preachers" who were told to go into all the world and preach (Mark 16:15).  It wasn't just "preachers"  who were told to visit the sick and those in prison (Matthew 25:33-46) or to take care of the widows and orphans (James 1:27).  Those are jobs that were only given to specific people, and it wasn't preachers.  Get this: Those jobs were given to Christians.  Do you want to know something else?  All Christians are also told to teach Christ to others too.  We're all to get out there and do these things.  Even if we've never been "trained".  There was no religious training even available for centuries after the church began.  Because God's strength is made perfect in our weakness (II Corinthians 12:9).  And even though we may think God's methods are too simplistic for modern times, the most simplistic of God's ways is way better than the most sophisticated method any person can come up with.  His ways are not our ways (Isaiah 55:8-9), but they certainly are better!

And where did the bragging come from?  "Our preacher graduated from _____ University.  You know all the best preachers come out of there!"  "Really, well ours was trained at _____School of Preaching.  They specialize in preachers who are sound."  This is so frustrating for me to hear because nowhere in the Bible does it even hint that a Christian must be educated at all before sharing the gospel.  I don't think it's bad for someone to go to a Christian University or such for training, but I certainly don't think it should be part of a congregation's qualifications!  Furthermore, it doesn't make someone any better of a Christian to go to one of these schools.  And I went to a Christian University!  I chose the one I attended because it had a reputation for being a strong, sound-in-the-faith school.  "Good preachers come from there."  And while all of these assertions were true, it's also true that just because a student got their degree from there didn't mean they were sound.  There was mandatory chapel every day and mandatory Bible classes for every student, regardless of major.  These can be good things.  But what was taught in these Bible classes that made them so special?  Bible, yes.  And the opinions of approved textbooks, commentaries, and professors.  Don't get me wrong - I'm not saying that textbooks, commentaries, or professors are bad.  My point is that the Bible is completely equipped to give us all the training we need as Christians.  While commentaries and the such can be helpful, we need to remember they're not inspired or infallible because they're man-made.  So are Christian schools.  While they can be very beneficial, we need to keep in mind that it is still a man-made institution, run by men, and subject to all kinds of things.

Apparently (according to modern tradition), a good sermon follows a very precise formula:

• It should consist of no more than 4 points (and that's pushing it) that all support the main point.
• You should be able to put an outline of it on the bulletin.
• It should fit within a specific time slot, never going over into lunch.
• It should be pleasing to the ears of the audience and make them feel good.
• It should generate enough energy to bring in more people.
• The person delivering it must wear the proper suit and tie.

Would the apostle Paul have qualified?!  Seriously, none of these things qualifies a good sermon, or is even in the Bible!  The gospel being preached is a good sermon.  You only need the Bible for that.  No fancy degree required.  Although you may need a degree to fulfill the public speaking role some congregations prefer.  There are some churches out there where you can attend for at least a month and never need to open your Bible.  But the preaching is "good" because it fills a non-biblical set of requirements.

Perhaps it is time to re-evaluate what is important and put our priorities in order.   Are we putting our faith in things from above or in the traditions of men?

Things That Are Right

So many times, things go wrong, and that's all we seem to focus on.  There isn't ever an end to the bad news.  Today, I want to tell you about things that are not bad - these are things that are just right.

I enjoy my children and being around them and watching them learn and grow.  This morning, I snuck in on them, and they were all snuggled up together fast asleep, holding hands.  They have this love for one another, and I hope they never lose that. 

I am so grateful that I have a husband who loves us and wants to take care of us and will go the extra mile for us.  He wants to do special things for us, and he often does the little things that mean the most.  He works to make sure we have a comfortable home.  O.k. I better quit talking about him or he's going to not let me blog anymore.

I have been blessed with the relationship that I have with my in-laws, which I often forget are in-laws unless someone points it out :)  Before we got married, I had heard so many horror stories about in-laws that I was frankly scared.  But I have always felt absolutely loved and cherished by all of my husband's family.  Every time I hear of someone getting married, I always pray they have a good relationship with their in-laws like I do.

I get to be a stay-at-home wife, mother, homeschooler, whatever you want to call it.  I wouldn't trade it for the world!

When we had a roof put on our house this past summer, it is under warranty.  Yay!

We had just enough snow to be fun, but not enough that any damage was done.  The anorexic snowman in the yard might disagree...  But he can get his own blog!

My ob says the bun in my oven is healthy and happy.  God is forming this little babe with love and care and attention.  Only 3 more weeks to go until they think it's safe to have this little one.  7 weeks until they predict it will be.  ? longer until God says this baby will come.  It's all in God's hands, and we aren't going to rush anything.  God knows better than any person when it's time.

My children pray every day for all kinds of things.  They pray for things adults would never think of and delight in doing this, just as they should.  And my oldest likes to prove what people say in the Bible.  If you tell him something's right or wrong, you better be prepared to tell him a book, chapter, and verse.  We're working on tact.

When I do go into labor, my daughter says she's going to brush my hair, and my son says he's going to paint my toenails :)  I'm going to thank God for every contraction and do some very hard work.

We're all sick, and my husband just called to tell us he's taking us to supper tonight so we don't have to stand up and cook.  I had to sneak this one down here so he wouldn't realize I'm still talking about him :)  My family eats together.  We're not all rushed to the 4 corners of the earth trying to do a million things at once.  We just sit down and eat together.  And enjoy each other.  And when we eat out, we still do it all together.  And enjoy each other. 

My cats are good mousers.  And they leave me presents every once in a while.  See how much they love me!  They like to snuggle me too.  Except the youngest one.  He still likes to play the "kill the eels wiggling under the covers" game.  And they all like to help me crochet.  I don't think I know what it would be like to crochet without them attacking the yarn and making everyone laugh.

2 words - wooly kisses.  That's when you get one of those little tickly kisses that make that funny sound that makes your skin feel like it's got wool, and you can't help but laugh.  And giving them makes your lips itch.  I'm laughing just thinking about them :D 

What are some good things that happen to you that you see are just little blessing from God that get unnoticed by most folks?  Things God does specifically for you.

Agape Love

In the Bible, there are several kinds of love.  I once heard a description of agape love that really stuck with me.  Agape love is deciding to give of ourselves for the good of the other person and expecting nothing in return.

This is definitely something that is missing in lots of marriages today.  This is one of the things the Love Dare is all about.  Putting this kind of love into practice has put many Christian counselors into business!  But this is also missing in friendships and how we treat other Christians.  It's not one of those character traits we can choose to ignore.

It's a decision, not an emotion.  You don't have warm fuzzy feelings about your enemy, but we're told to love them.  Matthew 5:43-44, 46 - Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you... For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?  Just like we're told to love our neighbors.  Sometimes our neighbors aren't the nicest people. Matthew 19:19b - Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.  Romans 13:10 - Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.

This is the love we should have for all Christians. John 13:34-35 - A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.  I Peter 2:17 - Honour all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the king.

We should be willing to go the distance.  John 15:12-13, 17 - This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends... These things I command you, that ye love one another.  We will get out of our comfort zone and help one another out and serve one another. Galatians 5:13 - For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another.  1 John 3:16-18 - Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.

This is how a husband is supposed to love his wife.  You can read the whole chapter, but the verses specifically on this are Ephesians 5:25, 28, 33 - Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it... So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself... Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.  Colossians 3:19 - Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Agape  love is how God loves us and how we are to love Him.  These verses sum it up better than I can.  1 John 4:7-12, 16-21 - Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us... And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world. There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. We love him, because he first loved us. If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? And this commandment have we from him, That he who loveth God love his brother also.

With Valentine's Day right around the corner, perhaps we should focus more on developing agape love in our lives rather than on the chocolate and roses aspect of it all.

Giving

We all know about giving to the Lord.  It can be done in lots of ways.  Some are the money that we give to the Lord's church, we can give our time, of our things.  Jesus even gave His life (Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many. Matthew 20:28).  No matter the method we are using to give, "...God loveth a cheerful giver." (2 Corinthians 9:7)  God wants the sacrifices and offerings we make to be free will offerings.  When we are grudging, it ruins it.  Without the love in our attitude, our giving is meaningless (1 Corinthians 13).

It's the same thing with our children.  They have chores and tasks they are expected to complete.  But we want them to do it with a good attitude and willingly.  If they grumble and complain, it's ruined.  The grumbling and complaining removes the beauty of their sacrifice.

In Matthew 10 Jesus sent out the 12 apostles.  He was giving them their instructions.  The last part of verse 8 applies to us as well "...freely ye have received, freely give."  God has given to us bountifully!  Think of all the things we have that we take for granted every day.  Some things we never even think about until they're gone.  Even our friendships are a gift from God.  It's God's good pleasure to give to us extravagantly (Luke 12:32 - Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.).  He's sure not giving grudgingly!  O.k. I'm getting off the topic.

Luke 6:30 talks of giving to all who ask (Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again.).  But then it goes on to say in verse 32 (For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them.) that you're doing this because you love them.  It's not something you do grudgingly.  It's not something you go and brag about ot your friends.  See the reward listed in verse 38 (Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.).  God's not after a sacrifice we check off our list, or he would have accepted the Pharisee in Luke 18:11-12.

This is just my thought here, but I've often thought this might be why God doesn't tell us to tithe in the New Testament.  I'm not saying tithing is wrong.  It can be a very good idea.  But we're not bound to tithe as the Old Law bound tithing.  See 2 Corinthians 9:6-7 again.  We are to think about it in our heart.  Give from our heart, not from a list and not so we can complain, but cheerfully.  We are to give.  There's no doubt about it.  God just wants us to watch our attitudes and give with a glad heart and willingly.  It's the difference between getting someone a gift because you kow it's expected and getting a gift for someone because you love them and really want to find the right gift and are excited to give it.

Imagine this:  A little girl has been playing outside on a warm and sunny morning.  She runs inside all breathless and excited.  Her cheeks are positively pink with pleasure.  "Look, look!  I got them just for you!"  At this proclomation, she lets her skirt tail down and proudly displays her treasure - a whole big bunch of dandelions.  Then she proceeds to empty her pockets too.  Those dandelions are the most beautiful boquet a mother or grandmother could hope for!  Every one was picked with love and excitement and joy.  The kitchen is so much brighter now, and the table is full of cups that have been transformed into vases.  There is no way you can see them and NOT smile!

Let your giving be like this.  This pure, uncomplicated, worry-free giving.  It will be hard not to do it with a hop and a skip in your step.  But maybe you shouldn't stifle the urge...

Low Iron?

Both children and my husband have all had strep throat this week.  So far, the Lord has spared me, and I'm so grateful!  When we found out my daughter had strep, we also found out she's a little low on iron.  Now there are all kinds of non-fun ways to raise your iron levels.  But here's a fun way:

Molasses Cookies

3/4 c. real butter, softened
1 c. sugar
1 egg
1/4 c. blackstrap molasses (the blackstrap molasses is where the iron comes from)
2 c. wheat flour
2 t. baking soda
1/2 t. sea salt
2 t. ground cinnamon
1 t. ground cloves
1 t. ground ginger
1/2 c. sugar

In a mixing bowl, mix butter, 1 c. sugar, and egg till smooth.  Stir in molasses.  It helps if you grease your measuring cup for the molasses first.  In another bowl, mix the rest of the ingredients except the sugar.

Preheat oven to 375.  Roll dough into walnut-sized balls and roll them in the rest of the sugar in a bowl.  Put on a cookie sheet 2 inches apart.  Bake for 8-10 minutes, only until the tops crack.  Cool on wire racks.

Store tightly covered with a slice of bread to keep them nice and soft.

Except the Lord Build the House

This was written by my friend Lisa Sipper.  I feel she did a superb job of putting this into words.

On Anastasia Island in Florida, there is a little fort which can be toured by taking a ferry across the Matanzas Inlet. In the 1740s, Fort Matanzas was the watchtower for what was known as the “backdoor” of St. Augustine for enemy forces borne by ship, looking to infiltrate the city by surprise. This small, temporary residence was manned by seven soldiers at a time. Their duties were to watch for invading troops, warn the city, and resist the enemy’s invasion by canon fire and musket fire. Within the fort was room for the soldiers to keep their provisions and ammunition, while working in shifts to ensure the safety of the inhabitants within the city of St. Augustine.

Fort Matanzas is not a very imposing fort. It isn’t pretty, and is situated in the middle of nowhere. What soldier would have wanted to be assigned for any length of time in this secluded structure, as opposed to the grand, well-defended Castillo de San Marco in the heart of St. Augustine? Yet, the soldiers who were watchmen for the city knew that standing guard in that tiny fort off the Matanzas Inlet was a serious undertaking. If the job was neglected, St. Augustine would be under surprise attack and the lives of men, women, and children would be lost.

The Bible speaks of the watchman and his role throughout the Old Testament. The word “watchman” is also translated “keeper” in some passages, such as II Kings 11:5, speaking of the “keepers of the watch of the king’s house,” and Esther 2:3, when it talks of Hegai, the “keeper of the women.” The Hebrew word is shawmar. It means to guard, hedge about, and protect. It also includes taking heed to oneself, being aware of the surroundings, and looking about carefully and circumspectly. Being a watchman or keeper requires full attention and alertness. A watchman is responsible for the lives of those for whom he watches.

In Psalm 127, this idea is given in a spiritual sense: Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.

For Christians who are part of the heavenly city, the Church, these are encouraging words. The watchmen of God do not need to worry or be troubled, for God will provide rest and give His soldiers comfort. (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)

Yet, the remaining verses in the Psalm seem unrelated to the first two verses: Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

This brings a greater meaning to the passage and presents what is at the heart of the Church, the Christian home. Just as the Church is the spiritual city of God, so each Christian family is a bastion built to withstand the forces of a spiritual enemy. Just like the Church, the builder of the Christian family is God. Without God as the designer and maker of the fortress of the home, it is vulnerable and only waits to be infiltrated. The duty of each individual family member is to submit to the Designer’s guidance found in His commands and examples in the Bible. God has designed roles for each family member to see to the needs of that spiritual city. If those roles are neglected, the city will not be able to withstand attack, as God, the master builder, designed it to handle.

Psalm 127 also gives ways to prepare for any spiritual attack. One is to be watchful, guarding the inhabitants of the city from spiritual assault. This requires watching for things that might be introduced into the hearts and minds of the family members which are not conducive to a moral, godly standard of living.

As mentioned earlier, the heart and mind shouldn’t be hampered by sorrow or sleeplessness, brought on by worry, when faced with the threat of the fiery darts of the wicked one. Trusting in God’s protection is so vital. It is also lack of faith which prompts the worry; and many times it causes rash, detrimental decisions to be made, keeping the family from trusting in God to see them through.

Another part of preparing for an attack is the training and instruction of the children. Have you ever considered your child as a weapon? What kind of blow is a misdirected arrow going to have in comparison with the arrow that is handled by the God-directed marksman? The marksman prepares and guides the arrow for shooting. We are aiming our children toward the mark of obedience to God. This task requires teaching righteous living and the consequences that come from disobedience. Children must be taught self-discipline in order to follow God’s laws. A child who won’t obey parental authority is going to have greater difficulty being obedient to God. Parents are held accountable for the training that goes on in the home!

Brief detour here: There is an undermining philosophy among families today that incorporating spanking into a child’s training does not teach a child the importance of making the right choices. While there are children with serious disabilities that the above philosophy may apply to, there are overwhelming numbers of families who make excuses, disobeying God’s words of wisdom. Spanking is not enjoyable. It is not an outlet for anger. It is a means to succinctly apply the understanding that there are consequences for bad actions. (Proverbs 23:13-14)

Lastly, Psalm 127 presents the children of the Christian home as speaking to the enemies at the gate without being ashamed. The word for “ashamed” (Hebrew word, boosh) means to become pale with confusion, to be confounded. This implies the children are given instruction within the city on how to speak with the enemy. Children of the Christian home are to be taught what the enemy will tell them and how to respond. When the time comes for them to combat the weapons thrown at them, they will not bow the head and hesitate about how to address what is wrong. They will confront it boldly with knowledge of the power that the builder of their city possesses.

Your Christian home is like Fort Matanzas. It is a small fortress guarding the Church from the backdoor attacks. You have been designated as the watchman! It is your duty and your defense is crucial. Don’t let your guard down; that is the way the city of God gets infiltrated. Don’t neglect your role! Don’t devalue it by the standards the world shoots at you. God has chosen your family to this task. He will protect and provide everything, everything you need, but you must defend His cause by building up your Christian home in obedience to Him!

Being Beautiful

My dh asked me last night if there was anything special I wanted for my birthday.  I thought about it for a long time, and I don't think I ever came up with anything I could tell him.  Being pregnant and, well, rather whale-shaped, I have decided if I could have anything I wanted for my birthday, I would like to feel absolutely, stunningly beautiful.  Don't get me wrong - he tells me I'm pretty and all that sweet stuff.  I just want to be able to look in the mirror and feel pretty.  Or leave my house and not feel like a cow just getting in and out of the car.  And it's not that I dislike being pregnant or want it over with.  There are beautiful pregnant women out there.  Just not me.

So after feeling sorry for myself for a while, I figured I'd better pull myself together and consult the manual.  What does the Bible have to say about being beautiful and attractive?

The famous woman of Proverbs 31 teaches us that seeking physical beauty is vain in verse 30 - Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.  Instead, we are to fear the Lord.

Beauty can be only skin deep.  Matthew 23:27 - Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men's bones, and of all uncleanness.  We can't be hypocrites and be truly beautiful.  God knows how we really are, even if we manage to fool everyone else.  We can't fool God.

Romans 10:15 says the feet of those who bring the Gospel of peace to others are beautiful.  It won't make my swelling ankles go away, but it will make them beautiful in God's eyes.

Psalm 149: 4 - For the LORD taketh pleasure in his people: he will beautify the meek with salvation.  This verse goes even further and states that we become beautiful through salvation.  We are all sinners and in need of salvation to be beautiful to God.  We are to worship God in the beauty of holiness.  (Psalm 29:2 - Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.)  We're told to be holy many times (I Peter 1:16 - Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.), but now we find it makes us beautiful too.

There are other verses along the same vein all throughout the Bible, but the message is clear.  Seeking after physical beauty is a waste of time.  I guess some people are blessed with it and others are not.  What I should be spending my time on is making myself spiritually beautiful and sharing that with as many as I can.

So what am I going to tell my dh I want for my birthday?  I really have no idea.  Do you?

Testing the Spirits

I Thessalonians 5:21-22 - Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.  Abstain from all appearance of evil.
Romans 12:2 - And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
II Corinthians13:5 - Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?
I John 4:1 - Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.

In all these verses, the word underlined comes from the same Greek word (which I have no idea how to pronounce or spell - I'll leave that to Greek scholars).  But it's talking about looking at things and being able to know if they are good or bad, right or wrong.  Sometimes it's translated "prove", "try", "qualify", or "allow".  But often it's translated as "test".  And we really must look at every single thing we believe and test it to see if what we believe is right. 

Our word "test" comes from the Latin word testum.  It was an earthenware pot or vessel.  Later, it came to refer to a vessel or jar used in refining, to separate pure gold and silver from any impurities.  Does that remind you of Zechariah 13:9 (And I will bring the third part through the fire, and will refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried: they shall call on my name, and I will hear them: I will say, It is my people: and they shall say, The LORD is my God.)?  What about Malachi 3:3 (And he shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver: and he shall purify the sons of Levi, and purge them as gold and silver, that they may offer unto the LORD an offering in righteousness.)?  We are to test like this - to identify and remove anything that is impure.

Logically, this means there has to be a standard as to what is right or wrong, pure or impure.  It's not up to what each person thinks is right or wrong.  There has to be a standard, and that standard is the Bible.  Cooks use measuring cups and spoons to cook.  Builders use plumb lines when they build.  Teachers have answer keys.  Tailors have patterns.  Religion is where some people draw the line and say it's o.k. to believe whatever you want.  That is just not true!  God's word is TRUTH (John 17:17 - Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.).  It is absolute truth.  It has to be.  If God's word is not absolute truth, then there is no truth at all.

If we are going to test our beliefs and ideas against the standard, then we must know the standard.  If you don't know what is right, how will you know what is wrong?  You can't test your beliefs if you don't know the standard.  Get in the Bible and read it.  Read it every day.  If you don't have a quiet time for Bible reading, or if you have small children at home, it makes it more challenging to find a good time to do this.  But it will be more than worth your effort!  Just pick up your Bible and read 5 pages a day.  That's not very much to read.  I've even known some who read the Bible in the bathroom since that's the only place they can get away from their children.  Try one page every time you go.  Some people have family members take turns reading it before supper to the rest of the family.  I like to get up earlier than my children and use that quiet time.  It doesn't matter when you do it or where.  But you should read your Bible!  After all, there will be a test...

Fond Childhood Memory

As my husband and children are playing out in our whole 3 inches of ice and sleet, I took advantage of the momentary quiet and started another load of laundry.  As soon as I started the drier, I remembered something nice from my childhood I'd forgotten.

When it was cold outside and we would go out to play, Mama would always start the drier.  The vent led into the back yard, and when my sister and I got cold, we would go stand under the vent to get warm.  We would stand under it and let it blow our hair everywhere.  Sometimes we would pull our coats out and let it puff them out.  That drier vent just made it all funner :)

Hope if you are outside in the winter weather you are enjoying yourself.  Be careful and don't forget to come in eventually and get warm!

Children's Church/Children's Bible Hour

Many churches now cater to many groups of people and do things they think might bring in more people.  One of the things I have seen in more and more churches is having a separate place for children to go during the worship assembly.  This is a place where the children are sometimes entertained or sometimes given a Bible lesson on their level.  There are many arguments for having Children's Church or Children's Bible Hour or whatever it's being called.  We should always look to the Bible to see what it says about something before we accept it as something good.

The Bible states on many occasions that all the people are to come together in one place for worship.  Not part of the people (Nehemiah 8:4-6, I Corinthians 11:20, I Corinthians 11:33-34, I Corinthians 14:23, I Corinthians 14:26, Hebrews 10:25).  We are supposed to assemble together, not in separated groups.  God demands we come together.

I have heard it said that all moms need a break, and sending children to Bible Hour will give mom a break so she can hear the sermon and pay attention better.  They sound like noble goals on the surface.  It is the parent's responsibility to teach children to worship God, be quiet and respectful during worship service, and show proper awe and respect for God.  If children can be taught to behave in Bible classes, then they can certainly be taught to behave in the worship assembly.

Shouldn't the children be able to benefit from having a lesson on their level?  Of course!  That is exactly why there are Bible classes.  But Bible classes are not part of the worship assembly where we are all to gather together.

What about the children of visitors?  They don't know how to behave.  No, not yet.  Any child can be taught.  Children learn by being in the worship service.  Sending them away to Children's Church deprives them of what they should be learning.  Parents should be bringing their children up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4).  Not being in the worship assembly keeps children from learning and developing the discipline to sit still, to concentrate, and to have a longer attention span.  Worship services teach children what worship is.  Children learn by teaching, observation, and experience.  The worship services are a place where children learn what true, good, sound preaching is all about.

They also learn that worship is NOT entertainment.  If we train them in Children's Bible Hour that they can expect to be entertained during worship, why are we surprised when they don't do things decently and in order as adults (I Corinthians 14:40)?

The adults that are teaching the children are in no better shape.  They are often nothing better than glorified baby sitters, and they are being forced to forsake the assembly (Hebrews 10:25).

There is no right way to do a wrong thing.

Miracles and Gifts of the Holy Spirit

Miracles in the Bible are called miracles, signs, and wonders, mighty deeds, and (certain) works. Miracles in the Bible are described by events which cannot be reproduced by nature and that are outside normal experiences (supernatural). A Biblical miracle is something astonishing, incredible, extraordinary, or unusual like the birth of a baby or barely missing an accident. And I’m not talking about the times where God works within the normal parameters of everyday life to work His will.

The examples of miracles in the Bible show the purpose for those miracles was to prove who God is – THE God, omnipotent, etc. These miracles were done by those proclaiming God’s word as proof that they were speaking the truth. Exodus 4:30, Mark 16:15-20, John 2:22-23John 3;2, John 14:10-11, Acts 4:29-32, Acts 8:5-12, Acts 13:7-12, Acts 14:2-3, Acts 15:12, Romans 15:18-19, I Corinthians 2:4-5, I Thessalonians 1:5-6, Hebrews 2:1-4. The miracles were performed so the words of the person doing the miracles would be believed by the audience.

Some say that those who speak in tongues are very spiritual. Where is the evidence of this? I Corinthians 14:6-19 emphasizes that those who did speak in tongues were not spiritually superior to others. I Corinthians 12:7-30. Some say the gift of miraculous healing is because God does not want us to suffer because we are His children. If this is the case, then what about all the first-century Christians who suffered horribly? The Christian is not spared from the same diseases, death, or tragedy to which everyone else is subjected. In fact, we are told to expect all this (I Corinthians 10:13, II Timothy 3:12, I Peter 4:12-17).

Now to this, some will say that a person won’t be healed if they don’t have enough faith. Some people were commended for their faith in the presence of a miracle (Mark 5:34). But what about dead people who were revived (John 11:44)? Their faith couldn’t have been an issue. The same can be said for people who were possessed by demons (Luke 9:42, 11:14). And for others, they just didn’t KNOW (John 9:11-12, 17, 25, 35-36, John 5:13). Sometimes the faith of the companions was cited (Mark 2:5). Paul surely had faith, but his faith did not remove his “thorn in the flesh”, his “messenger of Satan” (II Corinthians 12:7-10). Timothy had stomach problems that were not miraculously healed (I Timothy 5:23). Trophimus, a fellow worker with Paul, had to be left due to his sickness (II Timothy 4:20). Epaphroditus is an example of one who was sick “nigh unto death” (Philippians 2:27-30), yet he was not miraculously healed.

In Matthew 13:58, even though unbelief was predominant, Jesus did a few miracles there. Their continued unbelief made further miracles unnecessary. He was just practicing what he had preached in Mark 6:11 and Matthew 7:6.

Once God finished revealing all the information He wished to reveal (what we call the New Testament), the need for miraculous proof became non-existent. We can study the Bible diligently and see the miracles that were performed and know that the words spoken in the Bible are truth. We have all we need in the Bible (II Peter 1:3). To claim that we still need miracles today is to say the Bible isn’t all-sufficient (I Corinthians 1:22, II Timothy 3:16-17).

I Corinthians 12-14 was written to the church in Corinth because the spiritual gifts (speaking in tongues, healing, and prophecy) were being misused. The spiritual gifts are defined in chapter 12, and it goes on to explain how miraculous gifts should function harmoniously when used correctly. Chapter 13 goes on to tell how these gifts won’t be around forever, particularly verses 8-13. 13:10 talks about when “that which is perfect” comes. Paul was contrasting quantities, incomplete and partial miraculous gifts with something that would be total and complete. This is what we have – the fully revealed Word of God. The spiritual gifts were compared to childish things in 13:11, whereas the full truth that we have today (John 16:13). We no longer have partial access to God’s Word.

The same point was made to the church at Ephesus. The gifts given by Christ (Ephesians 4:8) were to have a specific duration (4:13). Many verses in the New Testament indicate that there is ONE faith (Acts 6:7, Acts 13:8, Acts 14:22, Acts 16:5, Galatians 1:23, Jude 3). Not a whole bunch of little groups believing different things. Unity between these divisions is impossible; because the unity being called for in the New Testament is a unity of truth, not an agreement to disagree. The faith being referred to is the completed body of information that sums up Christianity – the Bible (Ephesians 4:5). Miracles lasted until “the faith” was completely revealed.

Speaking in tongues as referred to in I Corinthians 14 refers to people speaking in languages that were unknown to the person doing the speaking (I Corinthians 14:2, 4, 13-14, 19, 27). It was the ability to speak in a foreign language without having prior knowledge of the language. The people speaking were being heard in the native language of the listeners (Acts 2:9-11). All tongue-speaking was done in known human languages, not incoherent gibberish (I Corinthians 14:9-11). The “tongues of angels” as referred to in I Corinthians 13:1 is often brought up in reference to speaking in tongues that are not understood by human ears. The meaning of angel is a messenger – one who communicates a spoken message. They were God’s messengers to humans. They are always represented in the Bible as communicating in human language, and they have the ability to speak all human languages. There would be no spiritual benefit for people to talk in a different “angelic” language.

Speaking in tongues was to be a sign to unbelievers rather than believers (I Corinthians 14:22). It was to be used to confirm to them the Word of God. What people practice today is not done under those terms. In fact, when a person attends a worship service today and is skeptical of the validity of tongue-speaking, it is said that tongue-speaking cannot occur because of unbelief present. This is in direct opposition to what was taught to the Corinthians. There is also every indication that the speakers of tongues in the New Testament could control themselves. They were not overcome, babble, or flail about. They did it one at a time, not interrupting one another, and were to remain silent if no interpreter was present (I Corinthians 14:27-28, 32).

Today, those who can speak in tongues or perform any other miraculous action is said to be baptized in the Holy Spirit, or Spirit-filled. But in the Bible, just because a person could do these things did not mean he had been baptized in the Holy Spirit. It is impossible to tell to whom John the Baptist is referring when he refers to the baptism of the Holy Spirit in Matthew 3:11. But in Luke 24:49, Jesus is clearly talking to his apostles. If this verse is referring to all Christians, then likewise, all Christians would have to be personally guided “into all the truth” (John 16:13) and would have no need of the Bible (John 14:26). Acts 1:4-8 talks about how it would be soon and that it would enable them to witness to the world what they had experienced by being with Jesus. This passage quotes what John the Baptist had said previously in Matthew 3, so it’s obviously talking about the same thing. This was confined to the apostles.

Acts 2 details that it was the apostles who spoke in tongues and taught the people. The 12 apostles were the ones who were baptized by the Holy Spirit (Acts 2:7, 2:14, 2:37, 2:43, 5:12) in Acts 2. They were all Jews. Then in Acts 10, the Gentiles received this gift in the household of Cornelius. This is prophesied in Joel 2:28. Joel 2:28-29 are further fulfilled by the apostles spreading the gifts of the Holy Spirit by laying on of their hands (Acts 8:17-21, 9:10, 10:3, 10, 16:9, 21:9). Philip received his ability to perform miracles in this way (Acts 6:5-6). Paul laid his hands on the Christians in Ephesus (Acts 19:6). Timothy received his in the same way (II Timothy 1:6). There is never an example of anyone with these gifts spreading their gifts further. The only examples given of spreading these gifts are from the laying on the apostles’ hands.

The baptism of I Corinthians 12:13 refers to the baptism that adds one into the body of Christ because it says “baptized into one body…” It doesn’t say they were baptized with the Holy Spirit. They were the beneficiaries of the Spirit’s guidance or assistance. They were baptized by the Spirit, not with the Spirit.

For us today, there is “…one baptism…” (Ephesians 4:5). Water baptism is confirmed in John 3:5, Acts 18:8, Ephesians 5:26, and Titus 3:5. There are no apostles left to lay hands on anyone today. Holy Spirit baptism was unique to the apostles and the first Gentile converts and doesn’t exist today. There is no need for miraculous gifts today because we have God’s complete written Word. Divine healing, speaking in tongues, miracles, and prophecy simply do not exist today.

Speaking the Truth in Love

I was reading an article this morning by Douglas Hoff.  His point was that when we speak the truth in love, we are not being arrogant.  Here are some points that he made.

Declaring there is only one true church Jesus will save is not a mark of arrogance.  It is stating the truth that will save souls (Ephesians 1:22-23).

When people believe one church is as good as another, there is no incentive to seek the true church.

What does it mean to speak the truth in love?  Apparently, some have concluded it means never upsetting anyone.  However, this is not in harmony with God's word.  See Matthew 15:12 and John 6:60-66.

Accusing a person of being arrogant when he stands for the unique identity of the Lord's church makes one a judge of the heart.  Only God can judge a person's heart.

If you are interested, some of his articles (including this one) can be found at Seek The Old Paths.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Birth Ball Exercises

I've gotten my birth ball out, and DH aired it up for me to the precise specifications.  Well, I'm sitting on it, and it feels a  lot better.  I can't kneel, so what are some other exercises I can do on a birthing ball?  Just so you know, I'm expecting answers from all my midwife, doula, nurse, and experienced followers!

My Son's Latest Funny Feat

WARNING: Not for the squeamish!

With deer hunting season in full swing, it could only be expected that my son get the fever too.  Especially since we have great deer hunters on both sides of our family.  While DH is out hunting today, DS really wishes he was out there too.  He has bunk beds in his room.  I went in there this morning to put laundry on his bed for him to put away.  The sight I saw made me laugh out loud!  He had taken his huge, almost as big as him, Clifford dog and had it strung up and hanging from his top bunk.  He was all decked out in camo, and had his plastic play knife and was "processing his buck deer".  He said it's a twenty point deer.  I raced in the living room to get the camera, and by the time I got back (less than a minute), there was no evidence, and he was quietly putting away his laundry.  His Clifford was laying on his made bed, and the knife was nowhere to be seen.  Oh well.  At least I have the memories!

My Daughter’s Birth Story

I went into labor at 2 a.m. on Friday, January 19th. I count 2 a.m. because that is when I could no longer sleep through the contractions, even though they began the night before. At first, I didn’t want to wake my husband because I didn’t think the contractions would amount to anything. So I waited for 2 more just to make me feel better, then 2 more. When I got to 4 contractions all within 10 minutes of the previous one, I woke him so he could time the contractions for me and help me not to panic. We had been timing the Braxton Hicks contractions for weeks now, just to get practice for the big show. Now we would see how well we could really do it. We continued to time contractions for the rest of the night. They never got regular, but they were still close enough that I couldn’t get rest in between them. They stayed pretty much within 10 minutes of one another, but they never developed a pattern. We just kept waiting. They weren’t very painful, just really uncomfortable at this point. They felt pretty much just like the Braxton Hicks I had been having all along. I wasn’t sure if they would eventually go away or if they would continue and lead to a baby. I had felt exactly the same way the previous weekend, but I was so nervous then, I think the adrenaline stopped the contractions. I kept thinking that surely I was in labor this time because they just wouldn’t stop, and I had done all the little tests to try to stop labor.

That afternoon, we brought our son to my parents for them to watch, and then I went to my chiropractor for one last adjustment. I was pretty sure it was labor because it hadn’t stopped in so long, but I wasn’t able to pinpoint where I was in labor because what was happening to me and what I felt like didn’t match the descriptions in my Bradley workbook. Some things matched for early first stage, some things were kind of like late first stage. Like, I never felt like I should anxiously clean or walk around. I just wanted to sit down and rest or lay down. So for the most part I did. I had been spotting, having a runny nose, loose BMs since the day before the contractions had started. The contractions didn’t really peak. They would just go pretty strong from the beginning, and then after about a minute, they would just fade. They kept on like this all day Friday and Friday night.

Around midnight Friday night, my mother-in-law arrived. We had been lying down for a while, but I couldn’t get to sleep. So I heard her pull in. Well then I didn’t feel comfortable making noise, so I tried to be quiet. Then I just got miserable. I knew in the morning, my folks would bring over our son, and I would be trying to take care of him. So I was worried how I would handle it all and be quiet too. Around 2 a.m. Saturday morning, I decided I wasn’t going to be able to sleep anymore, and I was getting very frustrated. I still wasn’t 100% sure if I was even in labor since still nothing matched that book. In the chart in my book, first stage labor was when contractions were about 5 minutes apart or less. Some of mine were, but some weren’t. Some contractions were about a minute long, but most of them were much longer. I thought for sure that the baby wouldn’t come if my contractions weren’t regular, so we waited to call our Doula/ Bradley instructor until she’d had more rest. After talking with my Doula several times, we thought I would feel better if I were checked to see where I was or even if I was in labor.

So we went to the hospital around 6 Saturday morning. Mary Jo was assigned to me as my nurse. When she checked, I was 3-4 cm. dilated and 30% effaced. We (me, my husband, and my Doula) walked and walked for about an hour and a half. There was still no change, so we went walking again. When I came back to the room at 11:30, I still wasn’t dilated to a 5, so we chose to go home.

It seemed like when I was at home, I could relax physically, but not mentally. Looking back, it seemed like it hurt more at home for me because I didn’t know where I was in labor, and I couldn’t gauge when we should leave for the hospital. I wanted to get to the hospital before transition, but only just before. But since I didn’t know where I was in labor, I couldn’t decide if we should leave or stay or call someone. So that part for me was very stressful. I was starting to find a rhythm to my contractions as to how to deal with them. They still were not regular or evenly spaced. But I found if I breathed in very deeply at the very beginning of the contraction and then blew it out slowly and repeated that through the contraction then it was not as scary for me. The contractions were still not really super painful. I was comforted because they still weren’t as bad as my menstrual cramps. So I figured I had a long ways to go, but it wasn’t that bad, so I could make it through the contractions. I also kept waiting until it got to where I couldn’t talk through my contractions. It was not fun to or easy, but I still managed to, so that also made me not think I was making any progress. I realized that talking on the phone with people seemed to stall my contractions for a bit. They would always resume as soon as I got off, but they seemed to stall while I talked on the phone. I think it was my subconscious need to sound like everything was o.k. When I realized this, I just refused to talk to anyone else on the phone. My husband just relayed messages for me. After all day Saturday and most of the night, I just decided it would be easier to walk around the hospital than to try to be quiet at home, so we called our Doula and left for the hospital again.

She met us at the hospital around 5 a.m. on Sunday I think, and once again we had Mary Jo. I was really glad because I liked her quite a bit, and she seemed more inclined than most to allow me to move around and do things naturally and let me eat. I was progressing very slowly, and I was getting really frustrated because I was also very tired. I was trying extra hard to be nice because I knew I was so tired and probably getting snappy with people. We had brought drinks and snacks to the hospital because we thought I would be limited to ice chips. As long as this was taking, I knew that would NOT work. We would bring them with us as we would walk through the deserted hospital halls and munch and drink. It seemed like we did this all night long. I eventually had to quit walking because my back was hurting so badly. It had hurt throughout my pregnancy, but it was just hurting much worse now. I’m not sure when it started getting worse, but there just came a time when I couldn’t walk anymore because of it. Then I just wanted to lay down. I so much wanted it to be done with because I was so tired. I kept imagining sleeping on my clean sheets in my warm bed in the dark. We did shut the blinds though and kept it pretty dark in the room and turned the sound for the monitor off.

Some time in the afternoon, I was really worried about not having enough energy to actually get the baby out. I was worried that my labor would just stop because I was completely out of energy. I had been 3 days without rest, and I was sincerely worried. We talked to my nurse about maybe walking again to try and speed things up. But I just didn’t know if I could walk anymore. So we decided to try for a little bit. Walking only lasted about 15 minutes. Then when we got back, it seemed like I was just so much worse. So we decided I should take something to help me rest for a little while. The nurse brought in a pallet, and we all tried to rest. I never did go to sleep, but I did rest and semi-doze. I could hear the other two sleeping, but it was still relaxing. When it wore off, I did feel better.

We spent the rest of the day Sunday at the hospital just trying to do what we could to help my body do what it needed to do. I pretty much tailor sat on the bed and closed my eyes to relax during a contraction. In between, we all just chatted. Later that evening, I started feeling very strange. I was having a hard time understanding what people were saying to me. Mary Jo was talking to me about which procedures we did and didn’t want, and I realized this was not normal to not understand her like that. At first I thought it was because I was still so tired. I’m still not sure it wasn’t. But then I started feeling very dizzy and a little disconnected from myself. I didn’t really know exactly who I was or who anyone else was either. They checked my blood pressure, and it was about the same as it had been. I thought it might be blood sugar. I had been eating my little snacks, but what if that hadn’t been enough? I ate some more when the nurse left and drank some juice, and it did seem to help a little.

Mary Jo was eventually replaced by Carolyn. She told us she had been trained in England as a midwife, and we were very glad because she also understood the importance of being able to move around and the natural aspects of birth. She told me after my exam that I was in transition. I was relieved because I figured I had only 30 minutes to an hour left to go, then the contractions would all be over. This was about 7 p.m. I think. I had my contraction rhythm down by now. I found the position that hurt the least and stayed put. I didn’t want to move, and I sure didn’t want to make myself hurt worse. I would close my eyes during a contraction to concentrate, and we would all talk in between. My back was still hurting, and I couldn’t do anything to make it quit, so I just tried to make it as comfortable as possible. After an hour had passed, I kept thinking it would all be over in a few minutes, but it kept going and going. I remember telling my husband I just wished I could go home and be able to go to sleep in my own bed. I kept getting really cold in my hands and feet and nose. I really didn’t want to eat anything else because I was sick to my stomach. I never vomited, but I felt like I might. I still wanted to drink though.

At one point, the nurse told me the baby wasn’t aligned exactly right and asked if I had been having back labor. She said the baby’s head was at an angle, and that was what was causing it to take so long. So we tried some pelvic rocking. That is really hard to do when you have a hep lock stuck in your wrist! It seemed like everything I wanted to do put pressure on that needle. That was what was the most annoying at that point. The pelvic rocking made it feel better, but my knees had just had enough, and the hep lock was hurting, so I couldn’t do very many. Then we tried some lunging with my foot on the rocking chair. That seemed to do the trick, because my back quit hurting, and it was easier to relax. I got back in bed, and just stayed there for the longest time. They asked me to lay on my left side, but it just hurt so much worse, and I felt like lying on my right side was how I needed to be. It was the only position I could find that didn’t make everything worse. I was having trouble relaxing then, and I was shaking. I don’t know if it was because I was cold or what, but if I was shaking during a contraction, I could NOT relax during it, and I couldn’t breathe normally, and it seemed like they lasted a lot longer than a minute. Then they did start lasting longer, and I SO wanted to go to sleep! When the nurse came back in and started to do my exam, my water broke.

For me, I had heard from virtually everyone that my contractions would get horrible after my water broke, so I was really dreading it. It also kind of forced me to accept that 2nd stage was coming. So I panicked in a big way. After that, I couldn’t stop shaking at all, and I couldn’t relax at all, especially not during a contraction. I wasn’t breathing normally – I was taking quick shallow breaths and doing everything wrong. I just kept thinking what would happen if I couldn’t push the baby out and they might induce or do a section. This made me worse, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

About an hour after my water broke, I guess I just was so exhausted I couldn’t help but relax. I just kind of stayed in one position and was in my own little world. Just me and my contractions. And occasionally, someone would get me water when I wanted it. I was trying to conserve any spare energy I had, so I was keeping my eyes closed for most of the time. I know that doesn’t seem like much, but it was also keeping me from remembering I was in a hospital in labor. I had convinced myself that these were just menstrual cramps, which was pretty much what they felt like. Different in some ways, but a lot like them.

About 3 a.m. Monday morning, I was laying there with my eyes closed, and I tried to breathe in with the contraction with my stomach like usual. But instead I found myself pushing just a bit. Not much, but enough that I thought I better stop and wait until I had “the overwhelming urge” to push. The nurse had been in previously and told me that I was fully dilated except for a little lip on one side. She said I was to let her know when I felt like pushing. With the next contraction, I did the same thing again, and I couldn’t help it. So there was really no “urge” to push, just my body pushing. But I didn’t want Carolyn to come back in there. When she had told me there was that little lip, she had me do a sample push anyway to see if the lip would move aside. I gave a little push then, but I told her I couldn’t push. First, it hurt a lot worse with the contraction. Second, those little words in all my books were imprinted on my mind behind my closed eyes – “Don’t push until you feel the overwhelming urge to push.” And I didn’t feel it, so I didn’t think I should push. Plus, it would waste precious energy to push prematurely. So she told me that when the time came, I would push, and there was no saying I couldn’t. It made me angry. I just thought it’s my body, and I’m not going to push before I feel like it. When I actually started pushing, I didn’t want her to come back in there because I didn’t want her to be mean to me anymore. So I didn’t tell anyone I was pushing. After several pushes, I think it was obvious to anyone in there that I was pushing. So I told them (my Doula and my husband) I was pushing, and of course they wanted to call Carolyn. I tried to convince them she didn’t need to come yet. My Doula asked if she could look to see if I was bulging. I still didn’t want to be immodest (another contradiction to what I had studied), but I figured better that than to have Carolyn back in there. After looking during a push, she agreed to wait a little bit to call Carolyn, but just then she came in there anyway to check my blood pressure. I tried not to push while she was in there, but I couldn’t NOT push. She saw me pushing and I had to tell her. I could feel when the baby started to move in the birth canal. It was a strange sensation. A friend had said it would feel like sandpaper moving. It didn’t quite feel like that, but it did feel a little rough.

That is when everything started going so fast. Before that, it was so relaxed. The pushing wasn’t hurting. It felt good – like stretching a sore muscle relieves the soreness in a way. The environment was quiet and dark and relaxed and then all of a sudden, it was like a whole bunch of bees flying around a hive. So I decided it was in my best interest to keep my eyes shut still.

My regular doctor was moving and couldn’t come in, so I was going to get the doctor on call. This doctor was a man, and I was hugely embarrassed that another man would have to see me naked. My regular doctor was also a man, but I had had months to prepare myself and convince myself he was Santa Claus (he has white hair and a very happy face) and therefore not real. I just tried not to think about the new doctor. I heard him come in and introduce himself. I think I introduced myself, but I’m not sure. I heard the nurse tell him the things in my birth plan like I wanted to push instinctively, and I didn’t want an episiotomy, but I did want perineal massage and hot compresses. He asked the nurses where the hot water was for the compresses, and I thought that was funny because they had the birth plan for perusal for hours and didn’t have the hot water ready. So that made me kind of like him a little. I also listened to how he was reacting when they said I didn’t want an episiotomy. He seemed to be totally o.k. with it, which is more than I can say for my regular doctor. He touched my ankle to make sure I was awake (ha), and told me that he was ready and I should just let him know when I felt like I should push. He seemed so calm in the midst of all the rush and confusion. I liked that about him.

Then Carolyn started the perineal massage, and I screamed. She kept trying to reassure me, but I just couldn’t quit while she was doing that. When it was time to push again, I said something, and realized I couldn’t hold my legs up and push. I just didn’t have the energy. So my Doula held up one leg, and my husband held up my other leg while I pushed. This was embarrassing, but I decided not to think about it. I was still clinging to sanity by keeping my eyes closed. In between pushes, I was trying to go to sleep, as silly as that sounds. Someone said the baby had a bunch of dark hair. I wanted my husband to look so he could tell me about it later. Then the doctor asked if I wanted a mirror to see the crowning. I didn’t because that would mean I would have to open my eyes, and that just seemed like a monumental effort, so I just said no thank you and told my husband to look for me. The doctor asked me to not push with the next contraction so I would stretch instead of tear. That was very hard, and it hurt to not push. I guess I felt the “ring of fire”, but it also wasn’t as bad as I expected. It was a stinging, tingling sensation accompanied by a lot of pressure. When the head was born, he said I hadn’t torn and should be fine with no stitches. I clung to this statement, as I really am terrified of stitches for some reason. I was just as scared of the possible stitches as I was of the birth. The cord was wrapped around the baby’s neck twice, but there was no problem. They just looped them off and everything was fine. So then when it was time for the shoulders to be born, Carolyn did more of that perineal massage. I don’t know if it was the perineal massage or the shoulders, but I tore – 2 inches, 2nd degree. I do know that the perineal massage hurt worse than the actual birth. When she was coming out, it didn’t feel like I was having a bowel movement. Hers was a totally different feel. I didn’t feel it in my rectum at all.

As soon as she was breathing, they put her on my stomach. I found I was so weak, I couldn’t even hold her. I was afraid I would drop her. My Doula helped me hold her for the first time. She supported my arms so I could hold my baby girl. I don’t really remember pushing for the placenta, but I did ask to see it for curiosity’s sake. I’d never seen a placenta before. I began to hemorrhage. The doctor gave my husband some hot compresses and told him where to push. Then he showed him where and how to massage my uterus to stop the bleeding. During this, I just wanted to hold her and kiss her. One nurse told me not to kiss the blood – ha! Someone hooked up the IV line with pitocin because they were having trouble stopping the bleeding. I didn’t care about the pitocin anymore, so I let them worry about that while I tried to nurse my baby. We finally got her on (she was better at it than I was) and in a position where I didn’t think she’d fall. The doctor told me I had torn (which I knew I had) and that it was a second degree tear. I looked at him for the first time, and I asked if he would stitch me up, and could he please use lidocaine. He looked at me as if I was strange to ask, but he said he would. I guess it’s just common, but I had refused so many other common things, I wanted to make sure I got that one. Those shots stung – it was just one right after the other, and I had to bite my lip to keep from saying ow for each one. Then he started stitching, and I could feel those too. I was just very glad when he was done.

Our baby girl stayed with us in the room instead of going to the nursery. We loved being together and just relaxing and sleeping. She slept sideways on my stomach instead of in her bassinet. That’s just where she just seemed to nuzzle in. We went home the next day, and we are all healthy and full of love.

My Son's Birth Story

When we were still dating, my husband and I both talked about how much we wanted children. When we got married, things just didn’t seem to work out naturally. After trying for a while and seeing several doctors, we were told we were infertile – the big I word. We were not daunted because we really believed (and still do) this was the Lord pointing us in the direction of adoption.

We didn’t really know where to start, so we prayed intensely and just started calling all the agencies we could find in the phone book. We called so many and got so many funny responses! We had specifics in mind. Like we wanted to do an in-state adoption since it would be easier to travel to get our baby, and we wanted a baby so very badly. One by one, the agencies were ruled out for one reason or another. We felt so down-hearted because we really wanted a baby. We went home and cried.

The next week at work, I got a call on my cell phone. It was Grace Adoptions. We had left a message on their answering service. They were on vacation and had just gotten my message after returning. We asked them all our questions, and things sounded really good. I was standing in the hall at work talking to them, and had to go into the office again and get my husband immediately when I got off the phone. We took our break right then and RAN to the car to call them back. We told them we would be there right after we got off work. And we did!

We talked to them, and decided to start filling out the paper work right away. They could tell we were so excited, and they cautioned us that it could take up to about two years to have a baby. We understood. That is pretty common in this area. We filled out all the paperwork and returned it to them the Friday night before Labor Day. When we got there, they told us there was a woman looking at our information and wanted to see a portfolio. We stayed up all night long finishing it and brought it to them Saturday morning. Turns out that woman didn’t pick us, but the next woman did! She liked our information, liked our portfolio, and was due October 28! When the agency called and gave us this news, I just cried for a long time. I was so happy!

The birth mother wanted to meet us (understandably), and so we went with the agency to go meet her and her family. I was so nervous she wouldn’t like us or that I would say something wrong. We got there, and her dad and step-mom were so nice to us and offered us refreshments. Then we met her, and I will not say her name to respect her privacy. But she was nicer than all of them! She asked all kinds of questions, and being so nervous, I don’t remember a single one of them. She did tell us “It’s a boy!” I do remember that they asked if we wanted certain testing done, and we didn’t. We didn’t care if he had birth defects or what race he might be or any of that. We just wanted our son! So we went home and began the frantic process of getting our house ready for a baby and for our home study.

We cleaned and went out and got things and clothes and diapers and well, just all kinds of stuff! We had a rail put on our back porch, fixed the front walk, and put the crib together all in the same day. We rearranged our room and figured out where the bassinet would go.

The flurry of activity was over, and the time wasn’t up, and we began to get nervous. The law here says the birth mother can change her mind after the child is placed in the adoptive family’s home. She has 10 days after the birth to change her mind. So of course, that is what we were focusing on.

Then we got the call from the adoption agency that they were going to induce labor early on the 22nd of October. The birth mother had asked if we wanted to be there for the birth. Wow! I never thought I would get to be so lucky! Of course we wanted to be there! It was about a 2 hour drive, but we were there at 7 a.m. I had been working on crocheting a baby blanket for him, and I brought it along as it wasn’t finished yet. The birth mother (it’s so hard to not use her name!) really liked it! My parents, my sister and bil, my mil, and my grandmother all showed up and were waiting in the waiting room. There was all this excitement, but I was afraid to look too excited because she might think I was crazy and change her mind right then and there.

Turns out she had started labor on her own early that morning before even coming to the hospital. I was glad because this meant it was our son’s time to be born. The doctor went ahead and gave her pitocin to speed up her labor, and she had an epidural a while later. About this time, Michael left the room to give her privacy, but she asked that I stay with her. She said she wanted me to be there for the birth of my child. Lunch came and went, and I didn’t even realize it. Then after a check from the nurse, the whole room changed and went into activity. It was time to push.

Her step mother and I stood on either side of her head. She was feeding ice chips, and I was keeping a cool cloth on her head. It seemed like I was doing such a pitiful thing when she was doing such a wonderful thing! We were both holding her hands. Shortly after, the doctor said the baby is crowning. He asked if she wanted to look, but before she did, she asked me if I wanted to look. That was so special to me! I didn’t realize a baby’s head could look so big! But there he was – almost in the world as we know it! When his head came out, the cord was wrapped around his head twice, and they had to untangle him. Of course, when they said that I was terrified! But everything was o.k. As soon as his head was unwound, he began to scream! When his arms came out, he was waving them madly, and he grabbed hold of the scissors for his umbilical cord. The doctor commented on his strength (it was so cute!). Then all of a sudden, he was out, and the birth mother asked if I wanted to cut his cord. He told me it would be tough to cut and that some people had trouble with it so don’t feel bad. With all my adrenaline, it seemed like a hot knife going through butter. Then the nurses checked him and did all those little tests. The nurses were looking around confused about whom to give the baby to. The birth mother said to give him to his mother, and they handed him to me.

He was so tiny! He had been screaming this whole time, and as soon as I held him and snuggled him in real good, he got very quiet. He had such a solemn little expression on his face. He looked so wise and so small at the same time. Then it was time for his first bath and the measurings and such. I carried him down the hall to the nursery and stood there while they washed him gently and talked about how lusty his little cry was – he surely had good lungs! During this, all the family is watching at the window, but I was too amazed to pay much attention to them.

The hospital wasn’t busy, so they said we could room in with him in a recovery room. They had a lactation consultant come in and brought us a breast pump. He nursed really well, and we supplemented with a SNS (which I grew later to hate). He was actually in our arms and with us, and it didn’t seem real! Some of our friends had driven the 2 hours to see us, and I will never forget how special that was to us! They bought us supper, and were as excited as could be.

Well, remember the law that says the birth mother has 10 days? It crept by so slowly! On day 10, the phone rang. It was her. I was so terrified to pick up the phone, but I did. I’m sure we talked, but all I remember was her saying “It’s o.k. I’m not going to change my mind.” To me, those are wonderful words, indeed!

Jesus Loves Me, This I Know

Did you know that Jesus loves you?  No, I mean REALLY loves you? 

As little children, we sing this song, and we firmly believe it, and it makes us happy!  But something changes as we get older.  Sometime between being little and high school, we think this song doesn't apply to us anymore.  Maybe it's because we're not "little ones" anymore like the song specifies.  So we sing it the few times someone leads it in the worship service, but we feel uncomfortable doing so because we don't really believe it.  Then as adults we sing it to our children.  It doesn't feel so uncomfortable because He really does love our little ones!  And we believe that!  Who could NOT love our little ones?!  Especially their creator.  By this time, we don't really think of ourselves as being divinely loved at all.  What happened?  Why do we begin to think this song does not apply to us?

But God has always given every evidence that He does love us.  He didn't want us to go to hell, so He sent a way out for us.  He sent His only Son.  Jesus even died a horrible death because He loves us!  He's preparing a place for us. 

God has the kind of love for us that he is so happy when we talk to Him in prayer and when we read the words He has given us.  When we come to Him with sadness in our hearts, He knows and understands and wants to ease our pain.  When we are excited about something, He wants to jump up and down with us (yes, it's o.k. for adults to jump up and down with joy - you know the kind that fills to overflowing) and squeal with delight.  When we can't sleep at night or feel completely alone, He wants to hold us in His arms and rock us gently.  He is so very sad and hurt when we ignore our times to get together.  He wants to hold our hands all through life if we will let Him.

So when you sing Jesus is all the world to me, my life, my joy, my all...  Mean it.  Live it.  Because knowing He loves you like He does, you won't be able to help keeping it all to yourself.  And when you sing Jesus Loves Me, sing it with all your heart.  Even if you do mumble the little children ones part or replace it with big ones or something like that.

Jesus loves me this I know.
For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong.
They are weak, but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.

Bible Time - Prophetic Parenting

I read this blog of a friend of mine.  Here is a link to her blog if you are interested.  I thought it was very good and couldn't resist sharing.  Hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

More On Church Unity

There can still be unity among all Christians even if there are differences between them. As long as the issues are not doctrinal, there can be absolute unity among all Christians. God would never give a command that we would be unable to follow. Everything else is opinion. Romans 14 refers to inconsequential things, opinions. Opinions will always differ because we are all unique individuals. Opinions do not get us to heaven or keep us out of heaven. But other matters regarding Christian living can be embraced by all Christians, and we can still be unified.

Different religions include different ideas in their group of key issues, hence their creed statements. But if we stick to the Bible, then there is no disagreement until personal preferences start to creep in. As for members of our congregation who disagree, are they matters of opinion or not? If they believe differently on important issues, why are they still there? There are plenty of denominations who have differing viewpoints. Surely one of them would match their beliefs. If they are not going to a different denomination, they either do not think the matter is important enough to change or they are not totally sure and they would rather be safe than sorry.

It is very easy to determine who is saved – anyone who does God’s will, which He gave us in the Bible. He would not provide a Bible for us and then make it too hard or confusing to understand. It is not my job to judge the intent of another’s heart, thankfully! But where we go to worship does say something about what we believe. That is why we have a sign on the door saying church of Christ. There are other acceptable Biblical names as well, but this is just what it is called in these parts. I have visited a congregation in Vienna where the only thing on the sign was The Lord’s Church meets here with the times. After speaking with them, the only difference I could see was a different order in the services and they had wine for communion. My point here, is it is not the name (as long as it is Biblical), it is what we believe and practice.

Members of other denominations are not members of the church of Christ because our differences mean too much to them. To them, our differences are a matter of doctrine, not opinion. It matters to them enough to mark the difference. So if they believe one way strongly enough not to be members of the church of Christ, they have already drawn the line of separation.

As far as denominationalism, the definition is a religious organization uniting in a single legal and administrative body of a number of local congregations, a sect. Sect means to cut or divide. We get the word "section" from this word. How can a church who follows only what the Bible teaches (nothing more or less) be a sect, a division of the whole? Divisions only come when some part is added, changed, or taken away from the original. Some churches who claim to be non-denominational merely refuse to take a stand on any tough religious issues, resulting in what they call "unity". This is unity in error. Christ demands unity in truth. By biblical example, there is no church government above the eldership at the local level. So a church with no higher government cannot be a denomination by definition. The Lord’s church is often imitated but never duplicated.

Scrooge

We took a field trip yesterday and visited a local university's production of Scrooge.  We had a really good time!  They did a child-friendly version that wasn't as long as their regular production, and I'm guessing they left out some of the scarier bits.  One of the children in our homeschool group played Tiny Tim, and he did absolutely wonderful!  The costumes were outstanding too.

DS was able to follow the story very well.  DD kept saying that Scrooge was mean, and a grouch pot, and naughty, and that he needed a spankin'.

More Laundry Experiments - Laundry Detergent Success!

Well, as promised, I experimented with laundry soap.  I think it's a success :)  There was something on the news about how when you wash your clothes, you just basically recycle the germs around your washing machine and redistribute them throughout your whole load.  The example they gave was something like the germs on your underwear being deposited on your handkerchiefs.  Gross.  There is a simple way to get past this - sunlight kills those pesky little germs.  If we all hung our clothes outside on a line, this wouldn't be a problem.  But we haven't had a sunny day here in over a month.  Not to mention, it's not warm outside, and clothes would take forever to dry.

The reason for my experiment with laundry soap is money.  Wow, it's expensive!  We have an HE machine, so we have to use the HE detergent, which can be more expensive too. 

All the ingredients can be found at Kroger on the laundry soap aisle.  The only thing we could find at Wal-Mart was the Borax.  Here is the recipe I went with:

Homemade Laundry Soap:
4 c. hot tap water
1 Fels Naptha soap bar
1 c. Washing soda (not baking soda)
1/2 c. Borax

*Grate the bar of soap.  We decided it would be easier to use a food processor or something.  Add soap to a LARGE pan with the water.  Stir continually over medium-low heat until the soap completely dissolves and is melted.

*Fill a 5-gallon bucket 1/2 full of hot tap water.  Add the melted soap, washing soda, and borax.  If the water is really hot, this step will go really fast.  Stir well until all the powder is dissolved.  Fill the bucket to the top with more hot tap water (but leave room for stirring tomorrow).  Stir, cover, and let it sit overnight to thicken.  It will thicken and also turn into gel.

*The next day, stir it up.  Spoon it into a used clean container (we used cleaned out gallon milk jugs) with 1/2 jug of soap and then fill with water.  You have to shake it up before each use. 

*The instructions I found said if you want it to smell good, you can add about 20 drops of essential oils to each jug.  To combat those pesky little germs, we added 20 drops of Tea Tree Oil.  Tea tree oil is an anti-viral, anti-bacterial, and anti-microbial.  We also did one jug with Sandalwood essential oil, and it smelled good too.

*Yield - 10 gallons of liquid laundry soap.  Think how much money you just saved!
Top loading machine - 5/8 c. per load - This is really close to 2/3 c. on my measuring cup in case you're wondering how much 5/8 c. is.
Front loading machine - 1/4 c. per load.
You can increase if your clothes are really dirty or smelly.

*Tip - some people said the Borax might leave a residue akin to soap scum inside your machine over time, so they recommend putting 1/2 c. plain vinegar in each load to combat this.  I just pour it right on top of my clothes at the beginning.  Another benefit is that the vinegar helps to soften your clothes.  Some people just use vinegar instead of fabric softener, but my clothes weren't soft enough with just vinegar.  We have really hard water, though.

If you try this, please share your results with me.  I'm interested to see what others find.  Also, if you scent yours, tell me what you used and how it turned out.